Resolution foundation

This is the time of year where everybody reflects on the year that has just finished, and one big part of that is also looking towards future goals. You know what I'm talking about; that's right, new years resolutions. Gotta love those resolutions that almost never get done. Every year we bust out our new vows to make our lives better, but by February they are a distant memory. Actually, they're not even a memory; it's like you never even made them at all.

However, being the onto it guy that I am, I have devised a slow-burning long-term plan that should help me to achieve these goals. You see, I believe most people fail because they're just too eager. There's no need to shoot for the moon right. Like we say in the hood: "Kick back brah." A baby can't walk without learning how to crawl first. And you can't learn how to swim before simply learning how to float.

Well, I'm applying that same fail-safe principle to my new years resolutions. With 2011, I'm gonna take it easy and start with some smaller goals. I plan to knock em outta the park, then sass up 2012 with some bigger resolutions. This should be considerably easier with the confidence I would have gained from completing my previous annual to-do list. It's all about building blocks right. While this year's list may seem little, don't be fooled. It will snowball into a monster avalance resolutions list in a few years.

So, without further ado, here are my new years resolutions for the next 12 months:

- Post at least 3 blog posts.

- Have a total of 12 showers.

- Watch a whole episode of this mysterious show on TV people refer to as "The News".

- Top up my phone at least once.

- Stop getting into fist-fights to the death with drug dealers I owe money to.

- Take 4 sexy photos.

- Go to one Uni lecture for every time I lie to a Mormon about my address.

- Have one friend on Facebook that I didn't have in 2010.

- Correctly predict the culprit in a Scooby Doo episode. Or Law & Order. One or the other, I'm not overly fussed.